I am a vinegar. That is not a typo; I like wine in very undeveloped, undeveloped areas.
The problem is that I have never been a wine lover. The expensive jewelry associated with the wine culture always leaves a bitter taste in my mouth. (It’s a culinary spice note.) The actual taste of the wine didn’t impress me either, even though my palate is as hard as a rock.
But after years of avoiding those things, I’ve learned that I’m only getting closer to being wrong. It turns out that all it took to open a whole beer brand was the right container.
The (deep breath) Yeti Rambler 10-Ounce Wine Tumbler with MagSlider Lid is a durable stainless steel goblet. It looks like the top part of an ordinary wine glass, minus the stem. Its teardrop shape is made from vacuum-insulated double walls that keep the water warm inside, just like your favorite cup. The tumbler is finished with a matte exterior that makes it easy to put it in your hand. The plastic top fits perfectly into the mouth of the goblet. The sliding lid allows you to cover all entry and exit points to prevent wine spills. It costs $25. At the time of this writing, you can choose between eight different colors. It is dishwasher safe and completely dishwasher safe.
I understand that “this guy” is not often how you want to hear someone describe a glass of wine. Traditional wine glasses are thin, elegant, and fragile. It telegraphs the maturity of the person. A precious wine glass says, “I am so noble that I drink and do not break the glass because it slipped out of my foolish hand.”
We cannot all be held to such a high standard. Some of us (I won’t name names) have a habit of drinking or drinking alcohol even when we drink a lot. At a dinner party or a tasting, drinking wine can be a source of anxiety because of some embarrassment.
What I want is a cup that can stop a bullet. The Yeti Rambler 10-Ounce Wine Tumbler with MagSlider Lid exceeds my standards for nothing and sure. I have turned it upside down. I dropped it, hit it, and dropped it (as a test) and only scattered small bruises on my various household clappers. Ah, but a good quality wine glass lets the wine flow well, you say? Good. I can release my breath by removing the lid and shaking… or just shaking the tumbler around the room.
I admit that I am an uncivilized pig. I don’t pray because I’m still happy because I’m running a party, and I’m afraid to read because I hear the word “mouthfeel”. But I know that I will continue to drink, anywhere and everywhere, as long as I have a bomb full of alcohol.
Yeti is for sea wine. It’s for the bag of slappers who drink Franzia in the park during the day. It’s about people with stones on the ground. It’s for carpet people. It’s for anyone subject to the laws of gravity and cursed with inexplicably sweaty palms. It is for those who know, deep in their hearts, that wine only tastes better when you can carry it well on a trampoline.
